I Had High Hopes

While I was pregnant, I had such high hopes for every holiday that came and went. It was, after all, the last time I would experience each holiday childless. For whatever reason I felt so let down at the end of the night. The magical, mystical, wonderful holiday that I was wanting never seemed to manifest. Don’t get me wrong, they were still great……just not quite what I thought they would be. Halloween is the first holiday that I have a living, breathing, child.

So far, Halloween has followed in line with what I experienced during pregnancy. My original plan was cancelled when my sister, brother in law and nephews moved to another state. It’s sad that we are going to miss out on the experience of trick or treating with cousins. My next plan of going over to my parents to trick or treat with Luke in our costumes (after Ronny got off work) has been derailed. One of my husbands coworkers called out sick yesterday, so my husband (stupidly) volunteered to go in late and get off late to cover the missing shift. Since he is getting off later than anticipated, we can no longer go trick or treating at my parents because they will have left for a Halloween party of their own.

At this point, Luke is asleep in the swing and I am trying to figure out what to do. I don’t want to just sit home. We do that every day…..and that isn’t in the spirit of Halloween. My husband text a different coworker (someone who actually had a little boy right when we would have been due with baby #2, and gave us his clothes) to see if they would mind some tag-alongs. I won’t know what they say for quite awhile though.

Either way I am really quite upset that Luke’s first Halloween is such a cluster. He isn’t going to know any different. He may in fact hate being in his costume and going all around. At least I got him into the costume once:


We were Ninja Turtles this morning.


Funny enough the last time I had this on, I was 9 months pregnant and looked so funny.


6 thoughts on “I Had High Hopes

  1. Don’t get too down on yourself. For my niece’s first Halloween, my sister did dress her up, but they stayed home and handed out candy. He might be happier at home where it’s nice and warm anyway…I imagine it’s probably fairly chilly where you are? I know it is here tonight!
    I do the same thing you do though…build things up in my head to be these grand things, and then whey they aren’t I just feel disappointed. So I understand how you feel. Either way, at least you got him into 2 costumes today, and will have the pics to look back on and remember!

    Liked by 2 people

  2. The first year of holidays are a little weird because our daughter tended to sleep through most of them. She’s two now and fully able to participate in different traditions and rituals, so I’m enjoying them a lot more. Be kind to yourself. 🙂 You’re doing great.

    Liked by 1 person

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