Here I sit 3 days away from 22 weeks and I am starting to panic. There is so much to being a momma that I didn’t even think about, and here I am 18ish weeks out and scared to death. I’m an amazing auntie (when I’m not trying to kill my nephew with pop rocks) but that doesn’t necessarily mean I’m going to be a great mom.
I’m fully aware that I’m not going to be perfect. Even Michelle Duggar probably makes mistakes. Half of the time I question whether or not I am actually ready for this. Honestly, what the hell was I thinking getting pregnant!?!? Don’t get me wrong. I am so thankful that I am even getting this chance when so many others are still fighting just to get to this point. I don’t take a single day for granted. Sometimes though, I have to be a new mommy to be and freak a little.
Right now my biggest concerns are mostly centered around making sure that I have everything I’m going to need to properly take care of a baby, and feeding tiny tot. I’m so nervous that I left something major off the registry or registere for too much of something or not enough of something. You can check our registries out here and here. I didn’t even register for a diaper bag because I have no idea what I’m looking for. I’m sure it will be less stressful after our baby shower next weekend just knowing what we have, what we need and adding small luxury items. Until that time I think I am just going to feel the pressure of caring for a tiny person in about 18 weeks and not having anything to take care of the baby with.
Another big worry right now is feeding this tiny person. I understand the basic principle of breast feeding, but some of the fine details need some attention. I only want the best for my little baby, but what am I going to do if I can’t breast feed or the tiny tot for some reason can’t have breast milk. What is the best way to build a stash of breast milk? Will I produce enough to satisfy my baby’s hunger? Do you really need those biscuits? Will that one goofy nipple cause issues? Where am I going to store all this breast milk that I’m saving up? It’s a lot of unknown and probably pretty normal concerns.
There are tohter concerns as well…..how am I supposed to make an appointment for tiny tots one week visit if I don’t know when the baby will be born? Is the hospital really prepared for my problems? How is my body going to react to labor? How can I get my husband to massage my fun parts to prevent tearing? Am I hurting tiny tot by sleeping on my back despite my best efforts to sleep on my sides? Is baby going to be too big?
Gahhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!! It’ll all be ok